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There once lived a young bald-headed individual that was a stereotypical Gardnerian Wiccan. His name was Barrett. He wore his ritual robe and sandals everywhere, with nothing underneath. As a result, he was often curious as to why he was so cold in the winter and why people would give him weird looks at the local Wal-Mart.

One day, Barrett left his athame on a couch, on which he was sitting, and proceeded to sit back down on the couch. This led to his athame poking him in his buttocks, a funny facial expression followed by a long pause. Following the long pause, he uttered the first thing that came to mind which apparently was “I’m Bleeding Profusely!” Moral of the story, don’t do dumb things, what you utter may become a dot-com where people attempt to educate others to not make the same mistakes you made.